The Emotional Intelligence Activity Kit
50 Easy and Effective Exercises for Building EQ

Authors: Adele B. Lynn, Janele R. Lynn
Pub Date: October 2015
Print Edition: $34.95
Print ISBN: 9780814449233
Page Count: 272
Format: Paper or Softback
e-Book ISBN: 9780814449240
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Excerpt
CHAPTER 1
EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE--THE FRAMEWORK
FOR GREAT PERFORMANCE
You've probably witnessed people in organizations
who display great skill beyond traditional
cognitive ability. More than likely, you have also
witnessed people who, despite great cognitive capacity,
demonstrate gaping deficiencies at work.
These deficiencies could be attributed to a variety
of factors, one of which is a lack of emotional
intelligence. The theory that multiple types of intelligence
exists has been recognized since 1983,
when Howard Gardner published Frames of Mind:
The Theory of Multiple Intelligences. Along the way,
the term "emotional intelligence" was coined to
describe competencies related to managing oneself
and one's interactions with others. Thirty
years of research and ongoing debate have ensued
about the definition of emotional intelligence and
whether it even exists. Still, if you are a coach,
trainer, or organizational development practitioner,
your job comes down to helping people become
more effective in their roles. In addition, you've
come to appreciate that something other than
cognitive skills is at play. In the learning and development
field, emotional intelligence is widely
accepted as a desirable element beyond cognitive
skills for success in the workplace. This book is
designed to give you practical ways to help others
improve their emotional intelligence.
Studies show emotional intelligence competencies
as a distinguishing factor in functions as
diverse as sales, service, healthcare, productivity,
profit, and even ethical decision making. Research
that demonstrates the link between emotional
intelligence and increased organizational performance
are not hard to find. One study found that
executives who scored high on Emotional Quotient
(EQ) scales were more profitable than their
peers and had a greater ability to express empathy
and self awareness than their peer, who stood
lower on the EQ scale.1 Another study showed
that businesses whose owners had a higher EQ
earned greater revenues and experienced higher
growth. The owners used their EQ to positively
shape company culture.2 As a predictor of performance,
Druskat found that emotional intelligence
is two times more accurate as a predictor
of performance than cognitive intelligence, and
it predicts success beyond an employee's skill,
knowledge, or ability.3 Her work examined how
teams and leaders effectively manage complex interpersonal
and coordination challenges in cross-functional,
cross-cultural, and self-managing work
environments. Emotionally intelligent managers
are responsible for a 34 percent greater annual
profit growth, increased customer satisfaction,
and higher retention, according to a 2003 study
by Reuven BarOn and Geetu Orme.4 Even ethical
decisions, critical to the long-term success of any
organization, were linked to emotional intelligence
in a study of physicians and nurses. Higher EQ
scores translated into decisions that were more
ethical.5 And, the more senior the leader, the
more emotional intelligence matters. In a study
of officers in the British Royal Navy, EQ competencies
predicted overall performance and leadership
better than any other predictive measures.
This was especially true as the officer obtained
2 THE EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE ACTIVITY KIT
higher rank.6 For a comprehensive understanding
of the research behind emotional intelligence,
visit the Consortium for Research of Emotional
Intelligence in Organizations.
A Lack of EQ--What Are the Challenges
and How Do They Affect the Organization?
Lack of emotional intelligence can limit a person's
ability to get results. This inability can limit,
derail, or halt careers. Here are some examples of
how a lack of emotional intelligence can interfere
with a person's ability to deliver results:
* One leader was known for always telling people
what to do. He had all the answers to all
the questions all the time. He second guessed
his executives' decisions and freely told them
what they were doing wrong. Besides annoying
people with his arrogance, he eventually
found himself inundated with details as others
learned that if they didn't involve him in
a decision, he would find fault with it. His
approach also cost him loyalty and turnover
when several of his key executives left the
company for other positions.
* Another leader was promoted to president of
a large division, in which a key role was to
maintain positive relationships with employees.
Her predecessor had done this by constantly
demonstrating his appreciation to
employees. He had strong bonds with people
at all levels of the organization, knew everyone
by name, and engendered a genuine sense
of caring and engagement. The new leader
struggled. In fact, she avoided people. She
even figured out which path to take to the
ladies room so that she could see the fewest
colleagues. Several months later, the employee
engagement scores had tanked and turnover
was at an all-time high.
* Another senior executive had an intense need
to compete and win. He always wanted the
biggest budget, the greatest span of control,
and the last word. It actually cost him dearly
in his relationships with his peers. Not until
the CEO told him that these behaviors were
the reason he was not considered for promotion
did he pay attention to the cost and consequences
of this behavior.
* A senior leader continually created tension
among her peers by always reacting with
skepticism to new ideas. Although contrary
opinions and evidence are useful in decision
making, someone who constantly reacts with
skepticism will find it is draining and damaging
to relationships. It also gives the person a
label that she may not want to have.
* A leader lost his job when his new boss became
tired of hearing him make excuses. His
favorite excuse was, "We can't control business
conditions." The new boss's favorite expression
was, "We create our own business
conditions by steering the business in the direction
of opportunity."
The leaders in these examples are real. Each
failure can be traced back to an emotional intelligence-
related competency. Each leader suffered a
career consequence because of a lack of emotional
intelligence. More importantly, each leader had
the ability to successfully recognize and overcome
his or her failure and increase emotional intelligence
competency.
However, leaders are not the only ones who
suffer career consequences related to limited emotional
intelligence. Everyday people are inadvertently
sabotaging their careers with these types of
behaviors:
* The IT person who, once again, has offended
the customer.
* The call center worker who rarely can deescalate
the conflict and, so, requires the supervisor's
time and effort.
* The engineers who intensify the never-ending
email battles for the sake of proving themselves
right.
* The coworkers who are so involved in the
daily cat fight that they miss the fact that
they are actually being paid to work.
* The healthcare worker who is so caught up in
the daily "who should be doing what" argument
that important health details are not
communicated.
And, no doubt, each of these persons may be
right about something. However, their methods of
interaction may be flawed. It's the methods that
THE EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE ACTIVITY KIT 3
encompass the emotional intelligence failure. Although
all of these actions may invoke an individual
career penalty, ultimately, the organization
suffers the consequence. Moreover, the consequences
can be costly. Lost customers, lost time,
the best solution giving way to ego, or even medical
mistakes, can all result from EQ failures. Otherwise
talented individuals misdirect their time
and expertise, and the businesses and individuals
both lose. The challenge of EQ failures begs for a
solution. Coaching and training offer part of that
solution.
Development professionals can provide an essential
service to the organization by enhancing
the emotional intelligence of the workforce. This
book offers the "how."
A Working Definition of Emotional
Intelligence
The definition of emotional intelligence is "the
ability to manage ourselves and our relationships
with others so that we can live our intentions and
reach our goals."7 This definition, and the competencies
that follow, offer a practical model for
emotional intelligence. In addition, the activities
in this book make the definition and competencies
actionable for adults in the workplace, which
is the focus of this book.
The first part of the definition ("the ability to
manage ourselves") clearly centers on with the individual.
Common language requires people who
are emotionally intelligent to be aware of their
emotions and be able to self-manage, self-regulate,
or exercise self-control. The second part of the
definition ("the ability to manage our relationships
with others") requires that people be aware
of the impact they have on others, so that they
can productively manage the relationships that
life requires. In the world of work, those relationships
are with employees, peers, customers, vendors,
supervisors, and other people with whom
we interact. If those relationships do not function
successfully, productivity, morale, retention, and
costs will be negatively affected. The definition
continues with "live our intentions and reach our
goals." From the point of view of an organization,
living with intention equates to acting in alignment
with the organization's values. Finally, an
organization sets goals to be achieved. Of course,
the definition can be applied outside of the organizational
context. If so, living our intentions
and reaching our goals would imply living and
exercising our personal values and reaching the
goals/purpose that we have set for our lives.
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